7DaysinParadise
Travel => General Travel => Topic started by: flopnfly on May 31, 2005, 05:41:00 PM
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Coping with your travel companion
Communication, flexibility keys to smooth trip
By Marnie Hunter
CNN
(CNN) -- No matter how carefully you plan a trip with a friend, a romantic interest or a new acquaintance, there will probably be moments of frustration and conflict along the way.
Even after the dates, destination and length of the trip are settled and the tickets have been purchased, there's still the possibility that problems could come up on the road.
Here are a few tactics to smooth out potential wrinkles before you depart and defuse tension when it crops up:
Plan the trip together
This seems obvious, but sometimes one person takes the lead and tailors the trip to his or her interests. Planning together allows for a more diverse and balanced vacation.
"Some people like to sightsee a lot, other people don't. Some people want to walk, some people would rather use public transportation," said Dorlene Kaplan, president of ShawGuides, a publisher of guides to educational travel and career programs.
"So it's finding out how compatible you are in terms of the things that you're going to be doing, the places that you're going to be going, how much time you're going to be spending together," said Kaplan, who also runs TravelChums.com, a ShawGuides site that helps solo travelers find like-minded companions.
Be clear about budgets
Vacation-time is not exempt from squabbles over money. Different budgets and mind-sets about leisure spending can leave travel companions at odds over what to do next, said Andrew Sharp, a psychiatric nurse practitioner at the Ochsner Clinic Foundation in New Orleans, Louisiana.
"Some people will want to go to an exclusive restaurant when others weren't prepared to do that," he said.
Discussing budgets before the trip will minimize misunderstandings and help travelers see when there's room for a splurge.
Kaplan recommends figuring out how shared costs will be handled -- will they be split as you go, drawn from pooled resources or settled up at the end of the trip?
Find out about lifestyle
Differences in lifestyle can be a rude awakening if they haven't been discussed in advance.
"There's nothing worse than being in the room and up at 6 a.m. when [your companion] wanted to sleep until noon," Sharp said.
"Sleep patterns can be very disruptive to those that don't hold the same pattern," he said.
The same can be said for dietary and other restrictions. Anticipating those differences in advance helps people adapt to each other more quickly and graciously.
Drinking habits may also be an issue, as alcohol tends to heighten conflicts.
TravelChums covers these and other questions on its pre-trip questionnaire.
Gauge coping tactics
Ask questions and draw from what you know about your companion to anticipate how they may respond to stressful situations. Is this person generally patient and flexible?
Sharp recommends asking a potential travel companion about their best and worst trips. What happened? How did that person respond?
Knowing a little bit about how your companion deals with adversity is advised, even if you would have done things differently.
"It's not so bad if you've kind of predicted that that's how they're going to behave in certain situations, than if it hits you by surprise," Sharp said.
Compromise
Be willing to make some concessions in the interest of having a good time.
"Agree to disagree. Do you really want to expend your energy harboring anger or ill feelings on what is supposed to be your vacation when what you should be doing is relaxing and enjoying it?" Sharp said.
He recommends purchasing travel journals for yourself and your travel companions as a way to reflect on the trip and defuse some of the frustration that may come up.
Take a break
Split up when tensions are high and divergent interests are pulling you in opposite directions. Be sure to set a time and meeting place and have a backup meeting set in case of an unforeseen delay.
"People tend to feel like they have to stick together when they are together on a trip," Sharp said. "And anybody with someone breathing their air, so to speak, 24 hours a day needs a break from the other person."
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Thanks Heather for that.
After reading through all that it sounds like I'm better off travelling alone!!!
:b: :b: :b:
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LOL Bellagio!
I told my mother the other day that the more I travel with girlfriends, the more I prefer to travel with my hubby! However, in fairness to mi amigas, they weren't so bad, just a bit too much complaining for my liking...nothing I couldn't tolerate, just a bit annoying, as were certain little "habits"...but I'm sure I have habits that drove them crazy too! ;)
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Thanks for the article Heather. Just reconfirms what I've always known. Best travel companion is my husband- always was, always will be.
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Originally posted by YVRck:
Thanks for the article Heather. Just reconfirms what I've always known. Best travel companion is my husband- always was, always will be.
I too have been lucky enough to have my GF with me the last couple times..but have gone with friends before and it has been A NIGHTMERE !!
Bulldog :s:
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Originally posted by YVRck:
Thanks for the article Heather. Just reconfirms what I've always known. Best travel companion is my husband- always was, always will be.
I'm sure that he will be happy to know that. :)
Heather
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I'm sure he already knows, otherwise why would he ask where we should travel for our upcoming 30th. wedding anniversary.
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WOW 30th...Congradulation in advace :D
:6: :6:
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30 years is quite an accomplisment. Congrats !!!
Have you decided where you would like to go for your anniversary?
Heather
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Wow, you guys are fast! I almost get the feeling I'm being followed around the forum these days.
To answer your question though, we're undecided between a diving holiday in Belize or an ocean kayaking expedition in the Queen Charlotte Islands.
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personally, I'd be more partial to Diving in Belize. :D
but that's just me...
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I hear you Johnny! We've already been diving in Belize- twice- last time three years ago. We noticed a huge degradation of the reefs in the five years in between those trips and I fear we'll be even more saddened this time around.
Personally, I'd just as soon wait a few months longer and go back to Australia and dive the Great Barrier again. Now that was spectacular!! The Maldives also interest us, but that trip is most easily done in combination with our already being in Europe on business.
We've been in the Charlottes several times as well and the diving there is great- but during the winter months. Gotta have the drysuit for sure in those conditions! Decisions, decisions!
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I am sorry for taking this off topic but Belize is a place I am very interested in. My son is doing a science field course in Belize in March of 06 and so I now have a whole new place to research! Any first hand information would be much appreciated. :7:
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Well I notice that come Monday my bank account will have been debited twice with the cost of my return flight to Canada - but I have NO travelling companion!!!
Hopefully by mid week it will have been corrected or else the fur will really be flying.
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Is this from the original problem with the :duh: travel rep?
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Originally posted by Milli:
Is this from the original problem with the :duh: travel rep?
Yes Milli it is. However the girl did say that both charges had been sent off to my bank for direct payment and this now has proved to be the case.
She also said that she would be putting through a credit so, as the second charge is only going through on Monday, it may be around Wednesday before the credit goes through.
I do not anticipate a problem though and as it's only £274 it's not the end of the world is it?